Parent Fail Friday

parent fail, little earthling photography, bellingham photographer

In which we share the ways that we are less than perfect.

Parent Fail #1:
This took place when Enoch was about four years old. Chuck’s work was hosting a contest where the kids were supposed to draw a picture of how their parent contributed to the company (Chuck is a heavy equipment operator). Adalia, Judah, Tilly and Enoch all tackled the assignment with gusto…Enoch ended up drawing a picture of two giant pumpkins in a field. That’s right, to demonstrate how his father contributes at work he drew two pumpkins. Well, it was October, we had been to a pumpkin farm, and that is all well and good, but had nothing to do with the contest or work. So when I sent in the entries, I didn’t send his in. I didn’t think it mattered, clearly he wasn’t going to win. Fast-forward several months when Adalia, Judah and Tilly all received packages in the mail containing little am/fm radios, duffel bags and more. Had they won? No, these were simply prizes for every one who entered. Everyone, that is, except for Enoch who’s loser mom didn’t bother to send in his picture. I’m still guilt-ridden all these years later.

Parent Fail #2:

This happened just last week. My in-laws and parents were both coming for dinner and Tilly kindly offered to make pizza. Awesome! She quadrupled the recipe and while she was busy assembling and baking pizza I decided to help with the kitchen mess. I grabbed the bowl she had used for dough, squirted in a generous amount of soap and started the hot water running. Several minutes later, as I continued to bustle around and “help” she asked where her pizza dough went…you guessed it, I “helped” by running hot, soapy water on top of the last hunk of pizza dough. Oops. I grabbed the dough, rinsed it thoroughly and wrung it out. Good as new.

Okay, your turn!

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17 thoughts on “Parent Fail Friday”

  1. My 11 yr old and 7 yr old both have FASD. All year, they receive music therapy. They have worked very hard, and are progressing enough that the teacher decided to include them in the year-end recital with his other students. This was such a big deal to them! They practiced for weeks, and on the big day,the teacher called to confirm we were coming. That night, my 11 yr old got dressed up and did her hair, and we drove to the recital. Doors locked, no lights, no cars. I don’t have the teacher’s cell #, so there was no way to contact him. I had gotten the wrong location! I was certain I had it right in my head, but when I talked to the teacher the next day, I realized it was, indeed, my mistake. I not only disappointed my kids, but put his recital short by 4 performances! Maybe a decade from now, I will also forgive myself.

  2. I am a football coaches wife.when my sixteen year old was about two,we were at the field watching practice.he started climbing and flipping over the small safety rail…please do not judge..I have no explanation….he did it probably twenty times successfully over a two hour practice. At the end of practice my husbands boss came to chek in…my son ran up and said watch me…proceeded to flip over said safety rail,crashed on head had to get seven stitches,still has a scar..AND…we were new to town. Big fail.we laugh now,but my sons hair has never laid quite right at that spot on the back of his head. Typed on ipad

  3. Not a big parenting fail, but one that still makes me laugh:

    When the kids were 2 and a little baby, we had big containers of alcohol gel on the changing table and in the bathroom. One day my 2 year old discovered how to dispense Purell into his hand. And did so. A heaping double handful. I came into the kids’ room and he looked up at me with a big smile and said, “Mama, I find the Pa-lell!”

    Now, when the boys manage to locate the only mud puddle on the playground and ride their bikes through it repeatedly, I think, “Mama, I find the mud!”

  4. My two-year-old was quiet for just a minute or two when I went looking for him. I couldn’t find him in the house anywhere and nearly freaked out…until I discovered him in the bathtub, drinking bubble bath…Turns out it’s non-toxic, but it must have tasted bad because he hasn’t tried it again.

  5. To clarify on the above, there was no water in the bathtub. He had opened the container of bubble bath and was drinking it!

  6. We sing a song about how to safely cross the street. it goes like this : stop look and listen before you cross the street, use your eyes, use your ears and then use your feet.
    A few months ago while walking out of Disneyland our 5 year old daughter was singing the song and would change the feet to other silly body parts, nose, fingernails etc. This was all fine until while in a crowd of people at the top of her voice she yells “use your eyes, use your ears and then use your Vagina!” I was mortified.

  7. This year my daughter wanted to go to our local amusement park for her birthday, something that we rarely do. I bought tickets online and got such a good deal that I bought season family passes which included some free guest passes. I loaded up three of my girls and a couple of their friends early Monday morning, we were all set to spend the entire day at the park. After an hour drive we arrive to find the place closed up and deserted. It turns out that they were only open on weekends for the first month of the season. The kids were all so disappointed. I tried to make it up with shopping, lunch and a movie, but it wasn’t the same. Next time I’ll be sure to check the hours.

  8. I made a chocolate cake when my middle child was 3. This particular little boy had a big habit of sticking his fingers in the frosting. So the that night I made a REALLY BIG DEAL about not putting fingers on the cake the next morning. I went to bed patting myself on the back and feeling a little smug for thinking ahead to what could happen. I was really getting the hang of this parenting thing.

    So, I hear him up and about the next morning and I get up to come make him breakfast and his entire face is chocolatey, there’s no frosting left on half the cake and he proudly showed his hands “MAMA, I didn’t put my fingers in the cake at all!!” Sure enough, clean hands.

    He had licked all that frosting off without using his hands.

    1. One thing moms learn quickly- be specific, and close all the loopholes! That is really funny, although I’m sure it wasn’t at the time.

      1. I thought I had learned that ๐Ÿ™‚ I told my oldest child at, actually around 3, must be the age, “please put up your toys”. She put them all on top of her toy storage, the window sill, and on top of her bed. She put them up.
        Literal little things ๐Ÿ˜€

  9. Last year we left Morgan at the fair. She didn’t just get separated from us, we actually left the fair and were all the way out to the van before Tilly asked where Morgan was. I was going to get mad at the kids for scaring me with their prank when I realized they were serious! We had gone out in two groups and I thought she was with Rod and he thought she was with me. In my defense, I did have the right number of kids on a quick head count. It’s just that one of them was Tilly not Morgan. Luckily we lost her in a place that has a specific lost child area.

  10. When my first born turned one we lived in Washington state. I wanted to start a southern tradition for her birthday and decided to make a homemade red velvet cake to share with all the guests. Being young and impatient, I frosted it too early and then watched it split right down the middle and into two halves right before serving it. Tried to put it back together with extra icing but it was a total loss! No more cake traditions here!! (plus no more red dye! haha) Poor kid- wanted her to have a fun tradition to grow up with, instead she can tell a fun “mom messed up” story every year!

    1. bakersdozenandapolloxiv

      Hilarious! Did you catch that the top layer of our rainbow cake slid off entirely? It happens…

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